days & night I will spend; I think that I never have felt as lonely as I did last night, I got your letters out and looked over them before I went to church in the evening.  I felt very sad all the time during the sermon & after I came home I felt so badly that I could not conceal my feelings, so I went to my own little room and indulged in a hearty cry & feel better this morning. Yesterday evening during the sermon I could not keep my thoughts from wandering back to our own home, and happy we might have been, & instead of going day after day alone to church, you might have been with me had it not been for this wicked rebellion, I must confess that I have lost a good deal of my patriotism or something. I don't know that I can say that I love my country less, but I am disgusted with the do nothing policy of our government, it is said that "coming events cast their shadows before," but the end is effectually shrouded from our short vision, but why do we despond?  Our Father knows what the destiny of this nation is; can we not trust Him?  Instead of adding to your despondency, I ought to encouraging you, but you see that I write just as I happen to feel & that is the way I want you to do, don't conceal anything
